Arguably, I have allowed BJJ to influence my life choices more than I have allowed any other single person, circumstance, or thing besides my family of origin. BJJ has mattered to me for many years, frequently to the exclusion or modification of many other life experiences. I remember times when I knew I wasn’t going

When I was first starting out in Brazilian jiu jitsu, I experienced an internal struggle every day I went to train. On one hand, I was stupid crazy about training. I loved what I was learning and simply disappearing into the focus, the experience, and the challenges. But on the other hand, the anticipation of

Several years ago, I was training with a man who had significantly less jiu jitsu experience than I. Indeed, at that time I had probably more than twice as many years under my belt (no pun intended) as he had months. So it wasn’t a surprise to me when he made an error that I

One of the many cool things about Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and grappling is if you travel to a different city for work or pleasure, chances are you’ll be able to find an academy to visit during your trip. Visiting a new academy can be fun and enlightening, as every place has its own personality and perspective

It’s been a little less than six months since the news story broke that two male grapplers allegedly sexually assaulted their female teammate on New Year’s Eve. It is a story that has rattled the grappling community, particularly those who consider themselves to be decent human beings, and particularly as additional allegations have continued to

In an earlier piece, I gave some suggestions about how to be a good training partner in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. Those suggestions focused on how to ACT. In this piece, I’d like to focus on suggestions for how to present your actual self, your body, your bag o’ bones. What you choose to have on your

Okay, XX chromosomes. It’s our turn. Here goes: On the one hand, I fervently believe women deserve the same opportunities and the same access to grappling that men do. On the other hand, I also believe that refusing to acknowledge there are differences between men and women in the grappling world is naïve, and is

You may have noticed I’m on a kick about how we as grapplers can better understand each other: the perspectives we need to know about one another so we can hear and feel heard. In short, I’m preoccupied with how boys and girls can play nicely with each other, not just tolerating one another, but

In an earlier article, I enumerated some rights I believe every grappler should be able to enjoy in his or her academy. As I mentioned in that article, however, there are no rights without attendant responsibilities: the behaviors and beliefs we grapplers must embody to ensure we are upholding our end of the bargain. Following are five responsibilities I believe every grappler should fulfill.

At my college graduation, which took place on a beautiful Sunday morning in June, I mostly remember being hung over to the core of my very being. But I do also remember snippets of inspired, fly-be-free messages designed to motivate me and my classmates to go forth and do good in the world. Specifically, I remember our college president announcing that the students from our medical and business schools, and eventually we undergrads, were now the official recipients of MDs, MBAs, or BAs/BSs, “with all the rights and responsibilities pertaining thereto.”